On Disappearing

by Josh Fuson

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1.
01:38
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2.
03:16
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3.
02:16
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4.
02:40
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5.
04:04
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6.
04:33
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7.
03:29
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8.
02:50
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9.
05:45
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10.
02:13
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credits

released November 18, 2014

All instruments and voice performed by Josh Fuson except Nate Dort adds synth to "Ask Me Again" and programming in "Medicine Take" and Buick Audra lends her voice to "Yeah I Do".

Recorded by Nate Dort at his house.
Produced by Josh Fuson and Nate Dort.
"Old Film" recorded and produced by Tate Eskew.
Mixed by Nate Dort and Josh Fuson.
Mastered by Carl Saff at Saff Mastering, Chicago, IL

Artwork by Erik Stell
Album design by Daniel Dennis

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Josh Fuson Denver, Colorado

While rooted in folk, the soundscapes in which Denver artist/producer Josh Fuson tells his stories vary from intimate vocals over an acoustic guitar to lush arrangements of soaring keys, weaving electric guitars, and anchoring drums and bass.

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Track Name: Silhouette
Kids with greasy hair
and shades plastic white
smoke the cigarette air
while synthesizers fight

I spot your silhouette
behind the record stacks
asking some know-it-all
where that new Ricky Lee Jones is at

As though I knew you before
and never will again
the way you wear the night
diminishes everything
Track Name: Ask Me Again
I crack open a bottle of wine.
No one here except me tonight.
Should I feel bad?
Cuz I don't feel bad.
Same dirty pants and shirt
that I change into after work.
Should I feel bad?
Cuz I don't feel bad.

But if you ask me again
maybe I will.

My hair, it splits and thins.
I take coffee with my vitamins.
Should I feel old?
Cuz I don't feel old.
It's ten pm and I'm in bed
when my friends are going out instead.
Should I feel old?
Cuz I don't feel old.

But if you ask me again
maybe I will.
Yeah, if you ask me again
maybe I will.

You call it moping around
and not taking social cues
So if you know me that well
just tell me what I should do
in order to be myself.
Track Name: Medicine Take
You're asleep in the next room.
I'll try not to make a sound.
I hope that the medicine takes
and the fever goes down.

As I watch the lines on my skin
wrinkling with age
it comforts me to know
we can still laugh the same way.

I love the man you've become
and I want you to stick around
so let's see the medicine take
and the fever goes down.
Track Name: Old Film
Decades of old film
shine on the white screen.
Your memory's sharp as mine
as your world flies on by.

You say you've lived too long
cuz your house needs work again.
The paint is peeling off outside.
The front step's crumbling.

You move yourself downstairs.
A shower and a bed.
A life that can's sustain itself,
you say, doesn't make sense.

Decades of old film
shine on the white screen.
Your memory's sharp as mine
as your world flies on by.
Track Name: Go Slow
Invite me up.
Take me home.
Go slow.
Go slow.

Fingers
trace backbones.
Go slow.
Go slow.

He will never know.

Who needs
the bright lights?
Go slow.
Go slow.

Make it last
'til sunrise.
Go slow.
Go slow.

He will never know.

He will never know.
Track Name: Yeah I Do
Yeah, oh yeah, I do
want to get in that car with you
and drive across the Appalachians
to the land of country music.

I don't know which hurts the most
is it that I can't or is it that I won't.
A tough call as we close the bar
but either way you'll be gone
and either way I'll be back home
with all my faults
that keep me from
being someone
leaving with you.

Yeah, oh yeah, I do
want to get in that car with you
and leave the sorrow of this city
taking just what I've got with me.
I'd hope that it rains part of the way.
We'd let the windshield set the pace.
And then maybe once in a while
you'd lift me with a lullaby.

I don't know which hurts the most
is it that I can't or is it that I won't.
A tough call as we close the bar
but either way you'll be gone
and either way I'll be back home
with all my faults
that keep me from
being someone
leaving with you.
Track Name: All Out Of Sorts
The 8am sun finds it's way through the shades
and wakes me up with bright lines across my face.
I thought the morning would bring us a fresh start
but here I am feeling all out of sorts.

There's no common headache.
Didn't have much to drink.
But how I wish that just holding you
would keep me from thinking.

I shouldn't resent you for sleeping so sound
and I shouldn't beat myself up for feeling so down
but when my convictions crumble and my heart's cold as stone
I can't help but wonder were we happier alone.

So put your arm around me
and tell me we'll be ok.
Or tell me to go fuck myself.
You knew I wasn't strong enough anyway.

I thought the morning would bring us a fresh start
but here I am feeling all out of sorts.
Track Name: Frank
Frank, I'm glad you finally cut your grass
but I hate it when you yell at your dog like that.
Better watch out or he won't come back
the very next time gets the smallest chance.

Make a run for it now.
Run for it, boy.
He's so unhappy
but it's not your story.

Third shift at the cannery has got to be hard
but taking it out on your wife won't get you far.
Better wise up or it's gonna smart
when you're left with a broken home and an empty heart.

Make a run for it now.
Run for it, girl.
He's so unhappy
but it's not your world.

Make a run for it now.
Run for it, boy.
He's so unhappy
but it's not your story.
Make a run for it now.
Run for it, girl.
He's so unhappy
but it's not your world.

Frank, I'm glad you finally cut your grass
but I hate it when you yell at your dog like that.
Track Name: Purpose Fades
She moved out months ago
and she's never coming back.
My friends say they told me so
and I should quit the sad bastard act.

But as my purpose fades
the city falls to shit
and it's such a mess to think
I don't know who she is
and even if I did
it's not like she would care
she'd rather be anywhere
other than here.

So many things back at my place
that I need to make my own again
and gradually disassociate
her from the rest.

But as my purpose fades
the city falls to shit
and it's such a mess to think
I don't know who she is
and even if I did
it's not like she would care
she'd rather be anywhere...

You know I could feeling coming.
I could hear it in her voice.
Two weeks before the day she left me
she had already made a choice.
Track Name: The How-Are-You Story
I hate wanting to know why
you picked up and left
without a fight.
Out of my arms,
out of my life.

Strength returns to the spirit slow.
This chipper face is just a show
and my how-are-you story's a pathetic joke.

I hate wanting to know why
you picked up and left
without a fight.
Out of my arms,
out of my life.

Three words always spill out too fast.
A contrived solution to a wretched past.
I love you.
But the die's been cast.

I hate wanting to know why
you picked up and left
without a fight.
Out of my arms,
out of my life.